by Randy Ooney
My Nickel’s Worth by Randy Ooney
Not too long ago, every office and most families owned a typewriter. For those of you under 30, you may look up “typewriter” on Wikipedia. We had a Smith-Corona, but Royal was most well known. The letter strikers all had springs, so you had to hit the keys pretty hard. Underwood just used gravity to return the strikers, however a proficient typist could sometimes hit one from behind, causing an error. No problem, though, after Paper Mate came out with something called “Liquid Paper” that corrected all typos. Typewriters are all sitting in garages now, next to the TV antenna and persimmon drivers, but our future generations will be in awe when they show up at Pioneer Village in Worthington. Liquid Paper still comes in handy when marking your house number on your trash can, or fixing a goof when doing the morning newspaper crossword or sudoku.
And, speaking of the morning newspaper, I worry that it could go the same way as the typewriter. Costs involved to employ writers, printers, pressmen, and delivery agents used to be covered by revenue from advertising, plus a nominal subscription rate. With the advent of the internet, and 20 cable news channels, many no longer purchase a daily paper. How will we ever get anyone to buy a Chevrolet again? Dinah Shore is dead, and now the new car newspaper ads may be joining her.
What’s next? Well, back when typewriters were used by league secretaries to compile league standing sheets, there were always a number of trophies at the year end banquet, to reward excellence. League Champion, High Games, High Series’, etc. One of my leagues had a special trophy that I cannot mention here; check with Tonka Pinbusters league president, Howie Herstein for details. It’s funny how the trophy looks good at the banquet table, but twenty years and 8 garage sales later…. We’d like to stick them in the attic or garage, but that space is being taken by typewriters, old golf clubs, and TV antennae.
Well, here’s a thought. The Minnesota Special Olympics includes bowling in their schedule of events. They welcome your old trophies. They can get someone to engrave new plates for them and award them to participants. I’m thinking that junior programs at most bowling centers may do the same for their future CBAers. I don’t think they take typewriters, but maybe you could fill the middle with potting soil, and plant some petunias. Send photos to “Better Homes and Gardens”.